15 Oct The lonely therapist

The psychoanalyst Contardo Calligaris speaks, in the book “Letters to a young therapist”, of the loneliness that the good therapist goes through. No gifts, no glamor, just him, his techniques and the challenge of helping the customer. I remembered what my professor at the Faculty of Psychology once said: “Being a therapist is not for those with an inflated ego, it is not for those who want to say that they attend such a client. It is a kind of priesthood ”.

I confess that I understand the author, since psychoanalysis, since its beginnings, has the characteristic of coldness and distance with the patient. However, even with the cognitive behavioral approach, Gestalt-therapy moved me. I had already seen a little in the coaching course, now I saw in depth in Humanism.

On another occasion, the teacher said that the pain was pedagogical. Yes, not all sadness is depression. Pain can teach, and a lot, if you allow yourself to. If there is no right answer to our questions, because we are beings full of subjectivity and have dynamic behavior, I conclude that, yes, it is impossible not to be touched by the other’s questions.

Sometimes, a hug, a human look or a handshake relieves more than a few techniques. Nothing is more therapeutic than genuine solidarity.